I just got back from watching the highly anticipated sequel to Batman Returns titled Dark Knight. I'm going to set aside the Heath Ledger comments for now because that seems to be all that anyone is talking about right now. Wow, where to begin. I feel as though I had just finished watching a rarity in American cinema. Not only was this film extremely rewarding, it was also very well done. It broke off from what viewers typically expect from an action/hero film.
The one thing that stands out about this movie was Christian Bale's noticeable size difference. One recommendation for Mr. Bale in the future: don't act in a role as demanding as The Machinist if you're planning on doing an action film following that. In Batman Begins, Bale is very large and tone. In Dark Knight, Bale has a more frail appearance. I don't know if this was Chistopher Nolan's intention, but Christian Bale's performance was actually quite grounded. Dark Knight focuses a lot more on Morgan Freeman, Aaron Eckhart, and Gary Oldman's roles. As hard as it is for me to say this, I really wasn't feeling an on screen presence from Maggie Gyllenhaal.
As for the action, I was actually expecting a lot more action. Don't get me wrong, the action scenes were plentiful, but I was expecting much more.
All of the characters really developed themselves and came into their own. I can't do this for much longer, I need to talk about Heath Ledger.
If you put me down to watch Dark Knight I couldn't tell you who was playing the Joker. Heath Ledger was that good. He was creepy, funny, and as convincing as you'll ever see someone play a character. From the very beginning you knew that the Joker was the worst kind of criminal you could ever deal with. I've got to get to bed, but this movie was great and was worth the lack of sleep that I'll have tonight. Cheers!
Friday, July 18, 2008
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Poor Grammar
If there is one thing that upsets me about American society today, it's how poor we have become in regards to our own written and spoken language. There is one word that is constantly spelled incorrectly and can alter the entire meaning of a particular sentence or paragraph. Of course the reader can distinguish the correct version based on reading experience, but the writer needs to be held accountable for not knowing their own language.
The words that I'm specifically talking about are "your" and "you're". If you don't understand what each word means and what context it is used, I suggest you start reading more. I see it all of the time in text messages, emails, blogs, etc. A recent study on CNN stated that incorrect spellings and grammar in text messages, emails, and on blogs doesn't not transpose or reflect a person's actual ability, or inability, to spell or how intelligent they are. I don't believe this...not in the least bit. I have seen it and I know many of you have seen it...our country has embraced ignorance.
If you truly don't care whether your grammar is accurate or not, you have done more than disappoint me. Your actions reflect upon your teachers, your parents, yourself, your loved ones, and most importantly American society. How is the rest of the world supposed to respect us and take us seriosly when our own citizens misspell words and use incorrect grammar? When we pay more attention to blonde airheads in Hollywood than to our own Executive Branch of government? It sickens me to even be associated with people who are "fine" or "cool" with being ignorant. If you think that spelling and grammar are small problems you're gravely mistaken.
When you drive down the road you might see signs for businesses and certain advertisers. The replacement of the letter "s" by the letter "z" is one of the worst examples in recent times (Good Times VS Good TIMEZ). We are setting poor examples to young, vulnerable children that misspelling words is not only cool, but lucrative as well. It has a much bigger impact than you may possibly fathom.
I was playing basketball with this young 18, 19 year old kid. He had a tattoo that immediately grabbed my attention. I asked him, "What's Geto? Is that a name of a lost friend or something"?
He responded, "What? Hell nah man! Do you know how to spell"?
I then asked him, "What does it mean"?
"You can't read? It says geto (ghetto)," he snapped back.
"Well, if that's what it's supposed to say, it doesn't. It's spelled wrong. Ghetto has an "H" after the "G"".
He responded, "No it doesn't. Hey, Darrell! Come over here! This guy thinks that my tat is spelled wrong. Tell me, what does that say"? as he points to his tattoo.
"It says GHETTO baby! Hell yeah! What? This dude can't read"? laughed Darrell.
I looked for someone who appeared to have a brain and I asked them to read it aloud for me. It was some guy from the exercise bikes and he read it like I did, "Geto? What the hell is a GETO"?
"Wait, what? Are you guys sure"? he said.
"Yeah man. I'm sorry bro, but your tattoo is spelled wrong. Wow. You paid for that"? I asked.
"Yeah, I did. I told him to write GHETTO on my arm and told him what style of lettering to use. Damn man. Are you sure it's spelled wrong"? he asked.
"Yeah man. Sorry," I responded.
You see what I mean? I was ridiculed and laughed at because I knew the actual spelling of a very simple word and this guy didn't. Why do we ridicule intelligence and embrace stupidity? Some of you might say that this is not a real problem and that I shouldn't worry. I'm sorry, but I disagree. For as advanced as we are for a country, we have failed to properly and accurately educate ourselves. Knowledge and information is everywhere. It is available to almost every person in the United States; there is no excuse for lack of an educated citizenry.
As Americans, we need to quit making excuses for mistakes and shortcomings and we need to man up. Admit fault and correct that fault so that it doesn't happen again. We need to correct each other irregardless of how it makes the other person feel. They'll be a better person for it, trust me. Stop ignoring problems simply to "be nice". If you care about this country and the people living here, you need to encourage people to take responsibility for their actions. Ignorance is not bliss; it is the failure as a society to properly educate one another. If you care about this country as much as I do you'll decide to take action. Being indifferent merely adds to the problem.
The words that I'm specifically talking about are "your" and "you're". If you don't understand what each word means and what context it is used, I suggest you start reading more. I see it all of the time in text messages, emails, blogs, etc. A recent study on CNN stated that incorrect spellings and grammar in text messages, emails, and on blogs doesn't not transpose or reflect a person's actual ability, or inability, to spell or how intelligent they are. I don't believe this...not in the least bit. I have seen it and I know many of you have seen it...our country has embraced ignorance.
If you truly don't care whether your grammar is accurate or not, you have done more than disappoint me. Your actions reflect upon your teachers, your parents, yourself, your loved ones, and most importantly American society. How is the rest of the world supposed to respect us and take us seriosly when our own citizens misspell words and use incorrect grammar? When we pay more attention to blonde airheads in Hollywood than to our own Executive Branch of government? It sickens me to even be associated with people who are "fine" or "cool" with being ignorant. If you think that spelling and grammar are small problems you're gravely mistaken.
When you drive down the road you might see signs for businesses and certain advertisers. The replacement of the letter "s" by the letter "z" is one of the worst examples in recent times (Good Times VS Good TIMEZ). We are setting poor examples to young, vulnerable children that misspelling words is not only cool, but lucrative as well. It has a much bigger impact than you may possibly fathom.
I was playing basketball with this young 18, 19 year old kid. He had a tattoo that immediately grabbed my attention. I asked him, "What's Geto? Is that a name of a lost friend or something"?
He responded, "What? Hell nah man! Do you know how to spell"?
I then asked him, "What does it mean"?
"You can't read? It says geto (ghetto)," he snapped back.
"Well, if that's what it's supposed to say, it doesn't. It's spelled wrong. Ghetto has an "H" after the "G"".
He responded, "No it doesn't. Hey, Darrell! Come over here! This guy thinks that my tat is spelled wrong. Tell me, what does that say"? as he points to his tattoo.
"It says GHETTO baby! Hell yeah! What? This dude can't read"? laughed Darrell.
I looked for someone who appeared to have a brain and I asked them to read it aloud for me. It was some guy from the exercise bikes and he read it like I did, "Geto? What the hell is a GETO"?
"Wait, what? Are you guys sure"? he said.
"Yeah man. I'm sorry bro, but your tattoo is spelled wrong. Wow. You paid for that"? I asked.
"Yeah, I did. I told him to write GHETTO on my arm and told him what style of lettering to use. Damn man. Are you sure it's spelled wrong"? he asked.
"Yeah man. Sorry," I responded.
You see what I mean? I was ridiculed and laughed at because I knew the actual spelling of a very simple word and this guy didn't. Why do we ridicule intelligence and embrace stupidity? Some of you might say that this is not a real problem and that I shouldn't worry. I'm sorry, but I disagree. For as advanced as we are for a country, we have failed to properly and accurately educate ourselves. Knowledge and information is everywhere. It is available to almost every person in the United States; there is no excuse for lack of an educated citizenry.
As Americans, we need to quit making excuses for mistakes and shortcomings and we need to man up. Admit fault and correct that fault so that it doesn't happen again. We need to correct each other irregardless of how it makes the other person feel. They'll be a better person for it, trust me. Stop ignoring problems simply to "be nice". If you care about this country and the people living here, you need to encourage people to take responsibility for their actions. Ignorance is not bliss; it is the failure as a society to properly educate one another. If you care about this country as much as I do you'll decide to take action. Being indifferent merely adds to the problem.
Matt Fyalka
Matthew Paul Fyalka Dec. 14, 1979-July 13, 2008 Matt, Matthew, Maneuw: Our Love, son, brother, nephew, cousin and friend. Today, we lost his smile, his wit, his laughter, his love. July 13, 2008: Matt was tragically lost to an automobile accident, leaving one of his elk scouting spots. Matt Fyalka was undoubtedly connected to the outdoors. He was a bit of a Fir, a moment at sunrise and the call of anything wild, including himself. He will live on through memories: a "Grizzly" hug, an "Avalanche" grin, laughter that rolled over rocks like his waded rivers, a mountainous heart that encompassed us all. Matthew will forever reflect in the majesty that surrounds us. Matt echoes in mountains, bugles with elk, glances in silver rivers, stops our ears with rain (like his wet-willies), dusts our face with snow. Matt will whisper each morning an affirmation: "Live it, Love it, Share it.", and we will continue one We will miss you, Buddy. Matt is survived by his "hero": father, Paul Fyalka; his step-mother, Sharon Fyalka; his mother: Robin Fink; his Love: Jenn Strickling; his brother: Jacob Fyalka; his sister: Tashia Heckard; his grandparents: Robert and Elaine Fyalka; maternal grandmother: Ann White, uncles, aunties, a herd of cousins, friends, and his dog: Trigger. Please, join us in a celebration of his life: Memorial Reception- Date: Saturday, July 19th, 2008 at 2:00 PM Location: 8111 Waller Rd.
This has been an ongoing trend for many young men from Puyallup schools in my age range. I remember the first time that a fellow student passed away that I personally knew. His name was Kevin Jackowski and he and I were always cool with each other. We were both in choir and, sadly, made fun of the same people. I still remember how the entire event played out as if it happened yesterday. Our teacher stepped into class and looked at all of us for about 15 seconds in total and complete silence. "Class, I have something very important to say to you. Our fellow classmate and friend, Kevin Jackowski, died in a tragic car accident over the weekend. If any of you need help in grieving, the school counselor has set aside additional time to help many of you during this difficult process. We should all remember Kevin and pray for his family". For the first time in my life someone I knew had died. It wasn't a grandparent, one of my parents, or even one of my close family members. This was a young man, much like myself at that time. It was at that time that I remember understanding how truly delicate our life really is and how quickly it can be taken away from us. From what we all knew, Kevin was in the back of a truck bed when it rolled over, thus crushing him. I don't know if this is actually what happened, but I never doubted it until I experienced another loss later in my high school years.
In the 8th grade, it happened again. I had a young man in my history class whom I joked around with and discussed music and girls from time to time. His name was Jessie Smith. He was fairly tall and was built like a football player. He and I were on the 7th and 8th grade football teams at Aylen Junior High. When I think of Jessie, I always remember his braces when he smiled. He was, from my recollection, a well mannered young man with a good head on his shoulders. However, I, like most people at school, were way off in our judgment of Jessie. I came to school one day and I was suddenly approached by my group of friends asking me if I had heard about Jessie Smith. I told them that I hadn't heard anything and to tell me because I knew it was killing them to tell me. "Jessie killed himself last night. Apparently shot himself in the head". At that very moment, I learned that not only were young men like me vulnerable to death by auto accidents, but by fragile emotional states as well. Nobody, including me, ever saw how truly sad Jessie was and how much he had going on in his personal life. The only thing that I remember about Jessie is that he was having a hard time dealing with his Dad either dying or actually being dead. I'm not 100% sure on which one that it was, but I'm more certain that it was about his Dad who was dying of cancer. Jessie Smith, a young and vibrant young man had taken his own life for reasons that many of us didn't understand and will probably never understand. Jessie's suicide took place right after I had fully recovered from Kurt Cobain's suicide in 1994. The day that I heard about Kurt dying was one of the worst days of my life. I mourned his death for nearly a year. I was fairly advanced when it came to music. I started listening to music from the older kids' generation starting in the 6th grade beginning with the Beastie Boys and Duran Duran. How many 6th graders do you know who even know who Duran Duran are? My Dad noticed how much stress I was going through and how depressed I had become because of Kurt's untimely death. I remember him telling me how pathetic of a man Kurt was for being greedy and taking his own life. He told me that he should have considered how his fans, especially the younger ones like me, would take his death. I remember a lot of memories from that period of my life, but from what my Mom has told me, I struggled quite heavily after Kurt's death.
By the time I had finished junior high, I had personally known 2 kids that had passed away. However, there were many, many more to come during my time at Puyallup High School.
The death that stands out the most to me during my days in high school are Aaron Duscharme and Justin Martinson. Justin was a close, personal friend of mine and we spent the night at each others houses and with mutual friends. He and my friend Travis were really into BMX racing and that is how we met. It was at one of the many sleep-overs that we had at Travis' house during 8th and 9th grade. Of course, many of us, including me, would make an extra effort to encourage Travis' younger sister to have a sleep-over the same night as we had ours. There were so many nights where we had pillow fights, hot tub conversations, and camping trips. Man, I still remember those days quite vividly.
Funny side story: I used to ride my bike over to Travis' house in the morning so that we could ride to school together. One morning, he was late getting ready. I told him that I had left a video game upstairs and that I was going to go grab it. In reality, I knew that his sister was in the shower and her room was right next to his. Well, my one and only attempt as a "peeping Tom" worked. I had strategically placed myself behind his door that had an angle that I could see into her room as well. I stood there refusing to breathe and she walked out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her. I remember her taking off the towel and standing there...naked. There has never been a "peeping Tom" experience better than the one that I was currently experiencing. To this day, not Travis or his sister know that I had done what I did. Do I regret it? Maybe. I, mean, what can I say? I was 13 or 14 and had raging hormones.
Back to the Justin story. I remember playing basketball and video games with Justin at his house which was about 2 or 3 blocks from Puyallup High School. I remember meeting his Dad, who was injured during the Vietnam War and was paralyzed from the waist down. He was the most motivated person I have ever met. Despite his physical setbacks, he excelled in wheelchair athletics and has several gold medals from the handicapped Olympics. In fact, he was the one who invented skies for people in wheelchairs and received a large chunk of money for his patent.
I remember his older brother and how much he looked like Justin. I think I met his sister once, too, but I'm unsure where or when that occurred. Justin's Mom, from my recollection, had either divorced his Dad or had passed away. All I know is that his Mom was never around and his Dad was single.
I saw Justin all throughout high school and we hung out less and less as time progressed. People fall into certain social groups and get separated by hobbies and music tastes. I fell into the jock scene, listened to hip-hop, and attracted a small portion of females. Justin, however, was still in the alternative music scene, rode his BMX and skateboard often, and attracted far more females than I. The last memory that I have of Justin was while I was working at Toys R Us. He came in and recognized me right away. I ran up to him, gave him some old school love, and gave him a hug. We talked about how our lives were, how our lives were after graduating from high school, and what we planned on doing with the rest of our lives. His hair had gotten much longer than what I remember it being and he was there getting something childish to play with. As he left, I waved to him not knowing that that was the last that I would ever see Justin alive. Shortly after that, Justin died in a car crash. I was told us that he had ran into a tree going roughly 70 mph. I was heartbroken and our little group of friends that had since grew apart, were once again brought together by the loss of one of our friends. It wasn't until I worked the night-shift at Tacoma General Hospital in the morgue that I found out the truth behind Justin's untimely death. I won't elaborate on it, but I cried for hours upon hours after reading what I wasn't supposed to be reading. I'll miss you Justin and every one of your chuckles and smiles that are engraved in my memory forever. I still regret reading the truth about his death, but at the same time, I'm glad I did read it.
The funniest thing that I remember about playing football was what Aaron Ducharme did to me. We were watching scrimmage footage that my (still) good friend David was filming for his 9th grade project. Aaron got the ball on a sweep and I was the pursuing linebacker coming in for a mid-level tackle. Aaron reached his hand out, grabbed my facemask, and threw me to the ground. The entire team laughed at the footage and I remember coach telling Aaron, "Man, that's funny as hell. But Aaron, you can't do that. It's a penalty. Poor Matt over there got to experience one of the easiest penalties to avoid. Aaron, from now on, be nice to Matt". He turned around and smiled at me so as to say, "Sorry man, but that was funny as hell". I had the Rudy reputation on that team because, although I was built like a football player, I was really short. Aaron always hung out with his fullback, Derek Keough. They were always cool with me, but never with the people that I hung around with...particularly Scott Maib.
I came home on March 9th, 1998 telling my Mom about a fight that was about to take place downtown and how much I wanted to go. The fight, as it went, was between the "skaters" and the "gangsters". My friend James wanted to go down there and help out the "gangsters" because James had and still has, to some degree, an anti-white complex. My Mom became worried and told neither of us to go and ran us down to rent a movie to keep us occupied.
The next day, all hell broke loose. The second I walked onto campus, there were news crews all over the campus. Not knowing what happened, I refused to discuss anything with any of the news crews. My friend James walked up to me and told me that Aaron had died last night during the fight that we both wanted to go watch. Apparently, a friend of mine for a number of years, Jeffrey Pennick, got into a fist fight with Aaron in a parking lot. Each person had roughly 5 or 6 friends each behind them cheering them on. What Aaron and everyone else didn't know was that Jeff had something up his sleeve...literally. While fighting, Jeff had pulled out a knife and had stabbed Aaron over 18 times in the face, head, and neck. Aaron shortly after and Jeff received 23 years in prison for his crime. I always hung out with Jeff and I had to witness a friend of mine being taken away to prison.
Jeff and I first met in 5th grade shortly after he arrived in Puyallup. I went over to my friend Shawna Needham's place to hang out with her and her brother Ryan. When I showed up, there was a black kid there. Now, you have to understand how rare black people were in Puyallup in the 90s. We started talking and Jeff managed to talk how great of a fighter he was. I called him out on it and we ended up fighting, with boxing gloves on, in Ryan's front yard.
I ended up having 5th and 6th grade with Jeff. In 5th grade, we had some beef. We would always play each other at basketball and challenge each other. One day, things reached a boiling point. Jeff was unable to play basketball because he has broken his hand/wrist a few weeks ago after a bike accident. Something happened and words were exchanged between he and I. I ended up calling him a "pussy". Jeff immediately got into my face and we both glared at each other for about 15 seconds. He then stepped back and hit me with his casted hand. After getting hit, I just glared at him until it was time to go into class. I didn't say a word to anyone for the rest of the day. After class, Jeff walked up to me in the hall and apologized for hitting me. I told him that I was sorry for calling him a "pussy" and we shook hands and hugged. After that, we were pretty close friends.
We hung out quite often and I started to get in my "I'm white, but I feel black phase" of my life. We would hang out, listen to gangsta rap, and chill. In 6th grade, he and I were voted "class clowns" and there was a picture of him laughing and me hanging upside down on a chain-link fence making a hand sign that had grown to become a class joke...the Jason Kidd triangle. I made the sign and made the goofy noise during the picture. Jeff had the biggest laugh on his face and that is the way that I will always remember Jeff. Even after he brutally stabbed Aaron, I only remember his softer, funny side.
Aaron was a huge loss to our school and put our school into the spotlight. During my senior year, we had news crews on campus for roughly 2 weeks during what was called the "race case". Because of the low number of black kids at Puyallup High School, many of them felt singled out and not taken seriously. A few things happened and the Thomas family ended up suing the school district for $6 million dollars...which they ended up winning after a year or so of deliberation.
After high school, many more of my fellow Puyallup High School alums came to pass away: Billy Stocking, Brandon Sensky, Derek Keough, Jake McQuade, and Matt Fyalka.
I remember having a few classes with Matt Fyalka because he had to finish a few more classes in order to graduate, but not because he was a bad student. He was involved in another auto accident that had killed a couple of people and the others had a long road to recovery. Matt would stroll into class with that pimp-like strut and tell me to crack a freestyle. He and I would rap in class to each other and it would piss the hell out of our English teacher. I remember him sitting next to Ryan and telling him to tell "the story". Ryan told him, "no way, dude. It's funny, but only to you and me". Matt told him that it was a great story for everyone to hear. It was about Ryan getting back at a teacher.
Ryan got into trouble and was forced to stay after school to discuss things with his history teacher Miss Beal. She told him to stay in the class and to feed her fish while she left to grab some coffee from the lounge. What Ryan did was one of the funniest things I have ever heard. Instead of feeding Miss Beal's fish fish-food, he masturbated into the fish bowl. Apparently she never questioned what he did. After Ryan finished that story, Matt and I were rolling on the ground laughing. I, at the time, had Miss Beal and how much she loved her fish. That was a great moment.
I remember running into his grandparents while I was working at St. Joseph Medical Center in Tacoma, WA. I noticed their last name and asked them if they were related to Matt. They told me that he was their grandson. They went on to tell me how proud they were of him and how he was pursuing a degree in forestry from the University of Montana in Missoula (he did graduate with a bachelor's degree in forestry). They told me how proud they were that he chose to stay motivated in his career while still doing what he loved. I gave them a hug and wished them well. They were glad to meet someone who their grandson had touched and I was glad to learn a little bit more about him.
Matt always had a smile on his face and was a guy very few could find a reason to dislike. Besides, who would want to? Matt was a warm soul with the ability to find the goodness in everyone that he met. He loved the forest, he loved nature, he loved people, he loved his family and friends, and he loved life. Matt touched a lot of lives during his 28 years on this planet including mine. Rest in peace Matt.
This has been an ongoing trend for many young men from Puyallup schools in my age range. I remember the first time that a fellow student passed away that I personally knew. His name was Kevin Jackowski and he and I were always cool with each other. We were both in choir and, sadly, made fun of the same people. I still remember how the entire event played out as if it happened yesterday. Our teacher stepped into class and looked at all of us for about 15 seconds in total and complete silence. "Class, I have something very important to say to you. Our fellow classmate and friend, Kevin Jackowski, died in a tragic car accident over the weekend. If any of you need help in grieving, the school counselor has set aside additional time to help many of you during this difficult process. We should all remember Kevin and pray for his family". For the first time in my life someone I knew had died. It wasn't a grandparent, one of my parents, or even one of my close family members. This was a young man, much like myself at that time. It was at that time that I remember understanding how truly delicate our life really is and how quickly it can be taken away from us. From what we all knew, Kevin was in the back of a truck bed when it rolled over, thus crushing him. I don't know if this is actually what happened, but I never doubted it until I experienced another loss later in my high school years.
In the 8th grade, it happened again. I had a young man in my history class whom I joked around with and discussed music and girls from time to time. His name was Jessie Smith. He was fairly tall and was built like a football player. He and I were on the 7th and 8th grade football teams at Aylen Junior High. When I think of Jessie, I always remember his braces when he smiled. He was, from my recollection, a well mannered young man with a good head on his shoulders. However, I, like most people at school, were way off in our judgment of Jessie. I came to school one day and I was suddenly approached by my group of friends asking me if I had heard about Jessie Smith. I told them that I hadn't heard anything and to tell me because I knew it was killing them to tell me. "Jessie killed himself last night. Apparently shot himself in the head". At that very moment, I learned that not only were young men like me vulnerable to death by auto accidents, but by fragile emotional states as well. Nobody, including me, ever saw how truly sad Jessie was and how much he had going on in his personal life. The only thing that I remember about Jessie is that he was having a hard time dealing with his Dad either dying or actually being dead. I'm not 100% sure on which one that it was, but I'm more certain that it was about his Dad who was dying of cancer. Jessie Smith, a young and vibrant young man had taken his own life for reasons that many of us didn't understand and will probably never understand. Jessie's suicide took place right after I had fully recovered from Kurt Cobain's suicide in 1994. The day that I heard about Kurt dying was one of the worst days of my life. I mourned his death for nearly a year. I was fairly advanced when it came to music. I started listening to music from the older kids' generation starting in the 6th grade beginning with the Beastie Boys and Duran Duran. How many 6th graders do you know who even know who Duran Duran are? My Dad noticed how much stress I was going through and how depressed I had become because of Kurt's untimely death. I remember him telling me how pathetic of a man Kurt was for being greedy and taking his own life. He told me that he should have considered how his fans, especially the younger ones like me, would take his death. I remember a lot of memories from that period of my life, but from what my Mom has told me, I struggled quite heavily after Kurt's death.
By the time I had finished junior high, I had personally known 2 kids that had passed away. However, there were many, many more to come during my time at Puyallup High School.
The death that stands out the most to me during my days in high school are Aaron Duscharme and Justin Martinson. Justin was a close, personal friend of mine and we spent the night at each others houses and with mutual friends. He and my friend Travis were really into BMX racing and that is how we met. It was at one of the many sleep-overs that we had at Travis' house during 8th and 9th grade. Of course, many of us, including me, would make an extra effort to encourage Travis' younger sister to have a sleep-over the same night as we had ours. There were so many nights where we had pillow fights, hot tub conversations, and camping trips. Man, I still remember those days quite vividly.
Funny side story: I used to ride my bike over to Travis' house in the morning so that we could ride to school together. One morning, he was late getting ready. I told him that I had left a video game upstairs and that I was going to go grab it. In reality, I knew that his sister was in the shower and her room was right next to his. Well, my one and only attempt as a "peeping Tom" worked. I had strategically placed myself behind his door that had an angle that I could see into her room as well. I stood there refusing to breathe and she walked out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her. I remember her taking off the towel and standing there...naked. There has never been a "peeping Tom" experience better than the one that I was currently experiencing. To this day, not Travis or his sister know that I had done what I did. Do I regret it? Maybe. I, mean, what can I say? I was 13 or 14 and had raging hormones.
Back to the Justin story. I remember playing basketball and video games with Justin at his house which was about 2 or 3 blocks from Puyallup High School. I remember meeting his Dad, who was injured during the Vietnam War and was paralyzed from the waist down. He was the most motivated person I have ever met. Despite his physical setbacks, he excelled in wheelchair athletics and has several gold medals from the handicapped Olympics. In fact, he was the one who invented skies for people in wheelchairs and received a large chunk of money for his patent.
I remember his older brother and how much he looked like Justin. I think I met his sister once, too, but I'm unsure where or when that occurred. Justin's Mom, from my recollection, had either divorced his Dad or had passed away. All I know is that his Mom was never around and his Dad was single.
I saw Justin all throughout high school and we hung out less and less as time progressed. People fall into certain social groups and get separated by hobbies and music tastes. I fell into the jock scene, listened to hip-hop, and attracted a small portion of females. Justin, however, was still in the alternative music scene, rode his BMX and skateboard often, and attracted far more females than I. The last memory that I have of Justin was while I was working at Toys R Us. He came in and recognized me right away. I ran up to him, gave him some old school love, and gave him a hug. We talked about how our lives were, how our lives were after graduating from high school, and what we planned on doing with the rest of our lives. His hair had gotten much longer than what I remember it being and he was there getting something childish to play with. As he left, I waved to him not knowing that that was the last that I would ever see Justin alive. Shortly after that, Justin died in a car crash. I was told us that he had ran into a tree going roughly 70 mph. I was heartbroken and our little group of friends that had since grew apart, were once again brought together by the loss of one of our friends. It wasn't until I worked the night-shift at Tacoma General Hospital in the morgue that I found out the truth behind Justin's untimely death. I won't elaborate on it, but I cried for hours upon hours after reading what I wasn't supposed to be reading. I'll miss you Justin and every one of your chuckles and smiles that are engraved in my memory forever. I still regret reading the truth about his death, but at the same time, I'm glad I did read it.
The funniest thing that I remember about playing football was what Aaron Ducharme did to me. We were watching scrimmage footage that my (still) good friend David was filming for his 9th grade project. Aaron got the ball on a sweep and I was the pursuing linebacker coming in for a mid-level tackle. Aaron reached his hand out, grabbed my facemask, and threw me to the ground. The entire team laughed at the footage and I remember coach telling Aaron, "Man, that's funny as hell. But Aaron, you can't do that. It's a penalty. Poor Matt over there got to experience one of the easiest penalties to avoid. Aaron, from now on, be nice to Matt". He turned around and smiled at me so as to say, "Sorry man, but that was funny as hell". I had the Rudy reputation on that team because, although I was built like a football player, I was really short. Aaron always hung out with his fullback, Derek Keough. They were always cool with me, but never with the people that I hung around with...particularly Scott Maib.
I came home on March 9th, 1998 telling my Mom about a fight that was about to take place downtown and how much I wanted to go. The fight, as it went, was between the "skaters" and the "gangsters". My friend James wanted to go down there and help out the "gangsters" because James had and still has, to some degree, an anti-white complex. My Mom became worried and told neither of us to go and ran us down to rent a movie to keep us occupied.
The next day, all hell broke loose. The second I walked onto campus, there were news crews all over the campus. Not knowing what happened, I refused to discuss anything with any of the news crews. My friend James walked up to me and told me that Aaron had died last night during the fight that we both wanted to go watch. Apparently, a friend of mine for a number of years, Jeffrey Pennick, got into a fist fight with Aaron in a parking lot. Each person had roughly 5 or 6 friends each behind them cheering them on. What Aaron and everyone else didn't know was that Jeff had something up his sleeve...literally. While fighting, Jeff had pulled out a knife and had stabbed Aaron over 18 times in the face, head, and neck. Aaron shortly after and Jeff received 23 years in prison for his crime. I always hung out with Jeff and I had to witness a friend of mine being taken away to prison.
Jeff and I first met in 5th grade shortly after he arrived in Puyallup. I went over to my friend Shawna Needham's place to hang out with her and her brother Ryan. When I showed up, there was a black kid there. Now, you have to understand how rare black people were in Puyallup in the 90s. We started talking and Jeff managed to talk how great of a fighter he was. I called him out on it and we ended up fighting, with boxing gloves on, in Ryan's front yard.
I ended up having 5th and 6th grade with Jeff. In 5th grade, we had some beef. We would always play each other at basketball and challenge each other. One day, things reached a boiling point. Jeff was unable to play basketball because he has broken his hand/wrist a few weeks ago after a bike accident. Something happened and words were exchanged between he and I. I ended up calling him a "pussy". Jeff immediately got into my face and we both glared at each other for about 15 seconds. He then stepped back and hit me with his casted hand. After getting hit, I just glared at him until it was time to go into class. I didn't say a word to anyone for the rest of the day. After class, Jeff walked up to me in the hall and apologized for hitting me. I told him that I was sorry for calling him a "pussy" and we shook hands and hugged. After that, we were pretty close friends.
We hung out quite often and I started to get in my "I'm white, but I feel black phase" of my life. We would hang out, listen to gangsta rap, and chill. In 6th grade, he and I were voted "class clowns" and there was a picture of him laughing and me hanging upside down on a chain-link fence making a hand sign that had grown to become a class joke...the Jason Kidd triangle. I made the sign and made the goofy noise during the picture. Jeff had the biggest laugh on his face and that is the way that I will always remember Jeff. Even after he brutally stabbed Aaron, I only remember his softer, funny side.
Aaron was a huge loss to our school and put our school into the spotlight. During my senior year, we had news crews on campus for roughly 2 weeks during what was called the "race case". Because of the low number of black kids at Puyallup High School, many of them felt singled out and not taken seriously. A few things happened and the Thomas family ended up suing the school district for $6 million dollars...which they ended up winning after a year or so of deliberation.
After high school, many more of my fellow Puyallup High School alums came to pass away: Billy Stocking, Brandon Sensky, Derek Keough, Jake McQuade, and Matt Fyalka.
I remember having a few classes with Matt Fyalka because he had to finish a few more classes in order to graduate, but not because he was a bad student. He was involved in another auto accident that had killed a couple of people and the others had a long road to recovery. Matt would stroll into class with that pimp-like strut and tell me to crack a freestyle. He and I would rap in class to each other and it would piss the hell out of our English teacher. I remember him sitting next to Ryan and telling him to tell "the story". Ryan told him, "no way, dude. It's funny, but only to you and me". Matt told him that it was a great story for everyone to hear. It was about Ryan getting back at a teacher.
Ryan got into trouble and was forced to stay after school to discuss things with his history teacher Miss Beal. She told him to stay in the class and to feed her fish while she left to grab some coffee from the lounge. What Ryan did was one of the funniest things I have ever heard. Instead of feeding Miss Beal's fish fish-food, he masturbated into the fish bowl. Apparently she never questioned what he did. After Ryan finished that story, Matt and I were rolling on the ground laughing. I, at the time, had Miss Beal and how much she loved her fish. That was a great moment.
I remember running into his grandparents while I was working at St. Joseph Medical Center in Tacoma, WA. I noticed their last name and asked them if they were related to Matt. They told me that he was their grandson. They went on to tell me how proud they were of him and how he was pursuing a degree in forestry from the University of Montana in Missoula (he did graduate with a bachelor's degree in forestry). They told me how proud they were that he chose to stay motivated in his career while still doing what he loved. I gave them a hug and wished them well. They were glad to meet someone who their grandson had touched and I was glad to learn a little bit more about him.
Matt always had a smile on his face and was a guy very few could find a reason to dislike. Besides, who would want to? Matt was a warm soul with the ability to find the goodness in everyone that he met. He loved the forest, he loved nature, he loved people, he loved his family and friends, and he loved life. Matt touched a lot of lives during his 28 years on this planet including mine. Rest in peace Matt.
Monday, July 14, 2008
"I Hate Politics!"
I love discussing politics. Whether I'm on break at work, at school, with a group of friends, on a date, having dinner, or standing in line for something, I love discussing politics. I have come in to contact with a few people who claim that they "hate politics". I always tell them that politics is, in fact, everything that goes on in your life. Hating politics is, in my view, a lazy excuse for not paying attention to things of important matter. If you go to the gas station to fuel up, the price of that gasoline and the taxes on your Sobe drink are all determined by politics. If you legally get married, politics played a part in your tax filing status and your tax exemptions. If you go to a park or a state park, politics plays a role as to what rules exist on that land, how much, if at all, it costs to enter, and whether that land exists or not. You see, politics just isn't what you see on CSPAN or observe on your local city council channel. Politics is "the art or science concerned with guiding or influencing governmental policy". Governmental policy, in actuality, is everything that occurs in your daily life whether you like to admit it or not. If you buy a house and some property, you have to vote whether to approve higher taxes on your property to fund a new local library, a new school or school improvements, and are directly influenced by the increasing/decreasing value of your property. Politics is everywhere. So, with that being said, why do people hate discussing it and avoid the subject altogether? Well, to me, it's an issue of how much someone knows. I'll admit that I'm not the person to discuss botany with or how many square feet of material is needed for the production of a pair of jeans or a dress. However, those things are merely hobbies and not something that affects a vast number of people. Politics is something that exists for everyone and, therefore, affects everyone along some line. Here is where I come to my main argument. Feeling uncomfortable/non-interest while discussing politics means you haven't done your responsibility as a citizen. People complain about the price of gas, the price of food, etc. and yet do nothing to improve the situation. I can't explain why some people gripe and complain, yet do nothing about it. People complain that life is hard and that things are getting more and more expensive. Yet, I fail to see many of these people making decisions that would either help their situation or improve their overall quality of life.
Politics plays a role in your life whether you like it or not. I have no respect for people who avoid getting involved and merely complain about things as a means to their end. If I'm at a table eating a meal and the subject of politics comes up, I listen and, when I can, provide a response. If someone proposes a change of subject, that should be denied by others at the table. Political discussion is very important to the bettering of society and the future of this country. It's crucial that people start paying attention and learning as much as they possibly can about as many subjects as they possibly can.
I propose this solution: The hardest part is the start of your ambition to get involved in any political discussion. Start by merely listening. Listen to each person's point of view and listen to other people's responses or criticisms. This will allow you to see at least two different sides to the story and allow you to start developing your own point of view. A lot of the subjects covered during discussions are merely rhetorical. Stating a particular point, whatever it may be, can be persuaded with evidence. This is where research and reading come into play. I remember how difficult the Israeli-Palestinian situation was and how much I hated hearing people talk about it. However, all it took on my part was listening and a steady balance of reading current events and the history of the conflict. It all starts with listening.
Listening is the most important thing that you can do. The feeling of discomfort will happen, but it will happen less and less the more you learn and engage with discussions with other people. Nobody can hop onto a bicycle for the first time and ride without some struggle. This is a part of life and learning. You will slowly develop a level of comfort about certain subjects and may become bored or uninterested. This is where you can move on to another subject or propose the changing of the discussion subject. This will allow other people to discuss alternatives or a subject that they might know less about than you. Here is where you can influence other people and make an impression on them.
The process of learning never ends and is strengthened by people exchanging ideas and facts with each other.
What if someone refuses to discuss a topic? This is where listening is most important. If someone says that the current discussion of religion is making them uncomfortable, simply and nicely ask them, "Why"? Sometimes allowing someone to discuss their reasons for being uncomfortable towards a particular subject will allow them to get more comfortable with discussing the subject. After listening to them, state how much you appreciate their input. Approach your response with caution and try to strengthen what they said while, at the same time, formulating your own response. The most important thing that you must remember is to make the conversation as positive and constructive as possible. This possibility of this person engaging in discussions in the future relies on how well you handle what they say and how you respond.
You see, political discussion is extremely important for all people. Many people refuse to engage in it because of a lack of general knowledge on the subject, their discomfort of debating, or for fear of being proven wrong. These are many of the humps that I have had to overcome and it was a long and grueling process. However, it was only grueling for me because I choose to learn as much as I possibly could about as much as I could. This probably wasn't the best thing to do, but it allowed me to feel comfortable in almost all possible discussions.
Discussing Britney Spears, Pitt and Jolie's baby, etc. may pass time, but does nothing to improve the state of the world or your intellectual capacity. In actuality, it's rather quite regressive to your overall intellectual level. This is why I refuse to watch television. Sure, it helps to pass time and to entertain you, but its entire future and level of success depends on every one's continued and increased attention. This, in reality, decreases the time that could be devoting towards your family or to improving your intellectual capacity. I want you to learn as much as you possibly can and I feel that it is important for me to help you in that path. I would like to help out as many people as I possibly can and I understand what many of you are going through.
It is commonly known that the discussion of politics and religion are dangerous grounds to walk on at work and in the beginning of a relationship. However, I feel that it could be easily improved if people were able to accept some else's point of view while being able to state their own. This is one of the many reasons that the freedom of speech exists. Formulated ideas come from discussion and the challenging of one's own point of view. Challenging a view or belief can lead to a solution and the overall improvement of that person's life. There are drawbacks to this.
Not everything said is truthful and is merely rhetorical. That is why it is important to advance your level of understanding so that you can challenge another person's view. This will require you to read news and information that you may not typically agree with.
With the accessibility of information in this day in age, it is a sorry excuse to not know what is important. Sometimes doing what makes you happy and what you enjoy isn't beneficial to you or society. The progression of humankind relies on the ability of the people to expand their intellectual capacity, to challenge themselves, and to meet and exceed expectations. There is no excuse for not becoming an integral part of society and being a part of the motivating force behind its change. The future is not guaranteed...we must earn it by constantly challenging ourselves and doing what we can to improve the overall state of the world. Thank you and I urge you to get involved.
Politics plays a role in your life whether you like it or not. I have no respect for people who avoid getting involved and merely complain about things as a means to their end. If I'm at a table eating a meal and the subject of politics comes up, I listen and, when I can, provide a response. If someone proposes a change of subject, that should be denied by others at the table. Political discussion is very important to the bettering of society and the future of this country. It's crucial that people start paying attention and learning as much as they possibly can about as many subjects as they possibly can.
I propose this solution: The hardest part is the start of your ambition to get involved in any political discussion. Start by merely listening. Listen to each person's point of view and listen to other people's responses or criticisms. This will allow you to see at least two different sides to the story and allow you to start developing your own point of view. A lot of the subjects covered during discussions are merely rhetorical. Stating a particular point, whatever it may be, can be persuaded with evidence. This is where research and reading come into play. I remember how difficult the Israeli-Palestinian situation was and how much I hated hearing people talk about it. However, all it took on my part was listening and a steady balance of reading current events and the history of the conflict. It all starts with listening.
Listening is the most important thing that you can do. The feeling of discomfort will happen, but it will happen less and less the more you learn and engage with discussions with other people. Nobody can hop onto a bicycle for the first time and ride without some struggle. This is a part of life and learning. You will slowly develop a level of comfort about certain subjects and may become bored or uninterested. This is where you can move on to another subject or propose the changing of the discussion subject. This will allow other people to discuss alternatives or a subject that they might know less about than you. Here is where you can influence other people and make an impression on them.
The process of learning never ends and is strengthened by people exchanging ideas and facts with each other.
What if someone refuses to discuss a topic? This is where listening is most important. If someone says that the current discussion of religion is making them uncomfortable, simply and nicely ask them, "Why"? Sometimes allowing someone to discuss their reasons for being uncomfortable towards a particular subject will allow them to get more comfortable with discussing the subject. After listening to them, state how much you appreciate their input. Approach your response with caution and try to strengthen what they said while, at the same time, formulating your own response. The most important thing that you must remember is to make the conversation as positive and constructive as possible. This possibility of this person engaging in discussions in the future relies on how well you handle what they say and how you respond.
You see, political discussion is extremely important for all people. Many people refuse to engage in it because of a lack of general knowledge on the subject, their discomfort of debating, or for fear of being proven wrong. These are many of the humps that I have had to overcome and it was a long and grueling process. However, it was only grueling for me because I choose to learn as much as I possibly could about as much as I could. This probably wasn't the best thing to do, but it allowed me to feel comfortable in almost all possible discussions.
Discussing Britney Spears, Pitt and Jolie's baby, etc. may pass time, but does nothing to improve the state of the world or your intellectual capacity. In actuality, it's rather quite regressive to your overall intellectual level. This is why I refuse to watch television. Sure, it helps to pass time and to entertain you, but its entire future and level of success depends on every one's continued and increased attention. This, in reality, decreases the time that could be devoting towards your family or to improving your intellectual capacity. I want you to learn as much as you possibly can and I feel that it is important for me to help you in that path. I would like to help out as many people as I possibly can and I understand what many of you are going through.
It is commonly known that the discussion of politics and religion are dangerous grounds to walk on at work and in the beginning of a relationship. However, I feel that it could be easily improved if people were able to accept some else's point of view while being able to state their own. This is one of the many reasons that the freedom of speech exists. Formulated ideas come from discussion and the challenging of one's own point of view. Challenging a view or belief can lead to a solution and the overall improvement of that person's life. There are drawbacks to this.
Not everything said is truthful and is merely rhetorical. That is why it is important to advance your level of understanding so that you can challenge another person's view. This will require you to read news and information that you may not typically agree with.
With the accessibility of information in this day in age, it is a sorry excuse to not know what is important. Sometimes doing what makes you happy and what you enjoy isn't beneficial to you or society. The progression of humankind relies on the ability of the people to expand their intellectual capacity, to challenge themselves, and to meet and exceed expectations. There is no excuse for not becoming an integral part of society and being a part of the motivating force behind its change. The future is not guaranteed...we must earn it by constantly challenging ourselves and doing what we can to improve the overall state of the world. Thank you and I urge you to get involved.
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